Defiant Students: Stop Your Worst Behavior and Classroom Management Problems

 

defiant student educational article

 

Defiant Students:
Stop Your Worst
Behavior and Classroom Management Problems
 

 Includes Free Anger Management Worksheet and Lesson Plan

 

 

defiant students"Nothing seems to work

with that child!"
 

Have you ever said those words?

If you work with very out-of- control, seriously defiant students, chances are you have said those words more than once. You were right. Nothing was working to rein in that youngster. In this issue, we'll explain why nothing worked, and what you can do that will work. Hopefully, this article will help you avoid saying those words so often.

Just about everybody has one– that child who is almost gleefully defiant and out-of-control. You know the youngster. He's the one who seems to live to torment vulnerable peers. He seems to almost take delight from engaging in problem behaviors like property damage, harm to others, verbal abuse, and defiance. If you noticed the heavy use of "he" in the last few sentences, that was not by accident. This child does tend to be a "he."

Can you name the mental health label that might be used to describe this type of child? If you've come to one of our popular professional development workshops, or been a longtime subscriber to this educational blog, you should know the answer.

defiant studentsThe answer is "conduct disorder," a topic frequently covered in the articles in this blog and also in our workshop. As you hopefully remember, the term "conduct disorder" roughly means that the child has no conscience, remorse, or relationship capacity. That means that these defiant students  don't care about hurting others or damaging property, so they do what they want, when they want, to who they want.

Only a mental health professional can diagnose this disorder, so it is very important that if you are not a social worker, counselor, etc., you never say that a child is conduct disordered (C.D.). However, it is okay for you to carry that concern in your mind.

Here is the most important information: You must work with C.D.s differently than everybody else. If you attempt to use conventional approaches with C.D.s, you will find "nothing works." There is your explanation for why nothing seems to work with some defiant students.

You may be surprised to learn that conduct disorders are not a tiny fraction of your students. Estimates are that 11-15% of your youngsters are C.D.s. That means you probably have more than one defiant student with whom nothing seems to work.

In our workshop, we devote hours to teaching you about this student. Obviously, we can't fit all that information into brief article. Yet, clearly, this isn't a student you want to work with when you have just a smattering of information on how to manage them, so we'll do our best to explain:

(1) Why nothing has been working to manage your defiant students

(2) What to do instead

 

Defiant Students:
How to Stop the Behavior and Classroom Management Problems

 

 Includes Free Anger Management Worksheet and Lesson Plan


 

student defianceWhy Nothing Works with

Defiant Students
 

Children and teens with conduct disorder are "wired" differently than other students. That means that they may not be able to care. Because of that difference, the following interventions will fail: character ed, values clarification, empathy building, second chances, making amends, and more– far too many to list here. These methods fail because the child must care about others if these techniques are to work. These approaches are absolutely fine for other types of children, but will never be of value with C.D.s. In fact, these methods make the situation worse because they communicate to these children that you don't understand who they are, and don't understand how to control them. That perception generally leads these youngsters to believe that they may be able to do whatever they want without having to deal with consequences that would be of significant concern to them.


What to Do Instead
 

First, if possible, stop using any intervention that requires that the child care. For example, stop using empathy-based methods. Stop saying: "Timmy, that makes Juan feel bad when you slap him." For a C.D., with those words, you just painted a target on Juan's back. Review the list of common interventions in #1 above, and discontinue using those approaches with children who may be C.D.s.

Article Continues Below
 

 

article on defiant students

 

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Article Continues Here

book on defiant studentsSecond, use approaches that are designed to work with children who appear to lack empathy and compassion. There are lots of methods to replace the conventional approaches that fail with C.D.s. We'll give you one key method here. It's a free student anger management worksheet and lesson plan. Check out this student behavior management worksheet and lesson plan from our Breakthrough Strategies to Teach and Counsel Troubled Youth Free anger management worksheetbook and ebook series. The worksheet is called "Do You Want to Go Through Life Without Brakes on Your Actions?"  and can work well to show defiant students that misbehavior costs them. That worksheet and lesson plan is from our Temper and Tantrum Tamers book which is one of the volumes in the 11 book Breakthrough Strategies series. This type of worksheet begins to powerfully demonstrate to C.D.s that "when you hurt others, you can get hurt too."

Notice that we are compensating for the lack of empathy by showing the C.D. that he will often have troubling consequences to deal with when he hurts people or property. (By the way, this intervention and handout is fine to use with almost any child, but is especially useful with C.D.s.)

So, the key point to include in interventions for C.D.s is: Hurting people or property can hurt you. This approach will do no harm if you have guessed wrong about a child being conduct disordered, but can really make a difference if the child actually is.

Now, you have one key pointer to help you work with your hardest-to- manage youth: keep the costs of misbehavior high. There are so many more methods to also use, that we must emphasize that this brief educational article is absolutely inadequate for giving you all you need to effectively manage your most unmanageable, defiant students.

defiant studentsTo best ensure your safety, and that of your students, be sure to more fully update your skills as soon as possible rather than rely on the limited information we have been able to squeeze in here. Our best resource is called All the Best Answers for the Worst Kid Problems: Anti-Social Youth and Conduct Disorders. It is offered as a book or ebook. We also offer many online courses on how to work with very defiant students.

Please be sure to note that we're not identifying C.D.s as "bad" or "hopeless." Instead, we are asking you to consider that you have a diverse population of youngsters, and you need to always select the correct tools for the correct kids. For students who have conduct disorder, choosing the wrong tools can yield disastrous results. Choosing the correct tools can put you back in charge of even the most out-of-control, conduct disordered, defiant students.
 

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    teachermissYou have students who struggle. We have solutions for students who struggle…so your job doesn’t have to be so difficult. We have cutting-edge strategies to manage group and classroom management problems like behavior disorders, trauma, disrespect, bullying, emotional issues, withdrawal, substance abuse, tardiness, cyberbullying, delinquency, work refusal, defiance, depression, Asperger’s, ADHD and more.

     

    Schedule the Breakthrough Strategies to Teach and Counsel Troubled Workshop to come to your site. This is the one professional development inservice that produces results, results, results. Call 1.800.545.5736 now. This surprisingly affordable inservice also makes a terrific fund raiser. College credit and 10 professional development clock hours are available. Your staff will finally have the more effective, real-world tools they need to work with today’s challenging, difficult youth.

     

    Contact us now, and begin solving your worst “kid problems” today. Call 1.800.545.5736, or email.

     

    Working with Troubled Students Doesn’t Have to be So Difficult
     


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    Library of Congress ISSN: 1526-9981 | Youth Change, Your Problem-Kid Problem-Solver
    http://www.youthchg.com | 1.503.982.4220 | 275 N. 3rd St; Woodburn, OR 97071
    © Copyright 2019, All Rights Reserved | Permission granted to forward magazine to others.


Stop Cyberbullying and Self-Harm: Cyber Smarts for the Facebook Generation

 

classroom management blog

 

Stop Cyberbullying and Self-Harm:
Cyber Smarts
for the Facebook Generation
 


Someday they may call your students the "Facebook Generation." Their
worlds revolve around all things electronic. As a consequence, the
venue for student problems is shifting from the real world to the virtual
one. Unfortunately, virtual world problems can be very much real world
problems too.

Cyberbullying prevention has become a must-do
for most elementary, middle and high school classrooms.

At our workshops, we are getting a lot more requests for
help with students who are facing or engaging in cyberbullying. We
also have been getting a lot of questions about what to do about
students who are literally trashing their own reputations and credibility
by posting damaging pictures and comments about partying, substance
abuse, their interpersonal relationships, and their feelings about their
teachers and bosses. In a time when more and more employers and
colleges are requiring access to applicants' Facebook and My Space
pages, students continue to make themselves unemployable and unlikely
admission candidates when their less-than-sedate lives are splayed all
over the internet– forever.

In this issue, you will be seeing cutting-edge, never-seen-before,
powerful new tools for the Facebook generation. They are designed to
reduce the cyberbullying, and self-harm your students may be involved
in on internet social network sites.

Just like the saying, "What happens in Vegas,
stays in Vegas," "What happens on the internet
stays on the internet," potentially forever.

Help your students avoid being haunted forever
by indiscretions, vulnerabilities, or misbehavior that they
exposed to the world when they where just thirteen or fifteen or
seventeen.

Your students need help with cyber-safety, and fortunately, we have
great cyberbullying prevention strategies for you.

 

Cyberbullying Prevention Methods

 

FACEBOOK
THE ACCIDENTAL RESUME
 

Cyberbullying prevention poster 279Students who post on
Facebook and similar sites
about partying, their intimate
relationship details, substance
abuse, or their dislike for their
employer and job, probably
don't realize that they are
doing great self-harm. Make
sure your students know that
many employers and
university admissions staff are
now requiring access to
students' Facebook and My
Space pages, and they often
ask to review students' blogs.

In fact, there are now sites so cyberbullying poster 280
sophisticated that bosses and
universities don't have to ask.


These rogue sites gather
pictures and text from
supposedly private pages and
blogs. A student may be only
13, but their misdeeds as a young teen may follow them in cyberspace
for the rest of their lives. Youthful errors used to stay in the past, but that will stop with the Facebook generation.

Because the internet is forever, you can refer to Facebook as "the accidental resume."

The intervention pictured above gives you state-of-the-art tools to educate your students before they are harmed in cyberspace. It shows a Facebook page where a student has made negative comments about his/her job, and revealed his substance abuse.

This worksheet/poster brings the cyber world and real world together. Ask students to view this worksheet through the eyes of a boss, school admissions officer, or apartment manager. (Thanks to special ed teacher, Chris Wells for this
truly amazing worksheet.)

View Posters 279 and 280 here.
 

CYBERBULLYING
ANTI-SOCIAL NETWORKING HURTS BULLIES TOO


Bullying prevention poster 97Bullies, be they cyberbullies
or real-world bullies, they're not known
for their empathy.

If you want to change the
bully's behavior, avoid
relationship-based
interventions at all times.
Instead, show the bully
that by hurting others,
he hurts himself.

Bullies will rein in their conduct if they may lose something they want, so show bullies that if their expertise with people is being a good bully, they will have great difficulty keeping jobs, apartments, roommates, friends, etc.

Teach bullies that there is "no way to hurt others without hurting yourself." Be sure that you don't let bullies say they can stop bullying but they choose not to.

Use some of the phrases included on our Poster #097 – shown above, click on it to enlarge it– such as "Bully today, bully tomorrow. Stop now if you can."

To order this bully prevention poster for $8, click here.

 

CYBERBULLYING
IS CYBER CRIME


"But I didn't think it was cyberbullying." That's what
students often say to avoid responsibility for their actions
online. Wipe out that excuse before it happens. Begin by
ensuring that all your students know exactly what constitutes cyberbullying.

 

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    teachermissYou have students who struggle. We have solutions for students who struggle…so your job doesn’t have to be so difficult. We have cutting-edge strategies to manage group and classroom management problems like behavior disorders, trauma, disrespect, bullying, emotional issues, withdrawal, substance abuse, tardiness, cyberbullying, delinquency, work refusal, defiance, depression, Asperger’s, ADHD and more.

     

    Schedule the Breakthrough Strategies to Teach and Counsel Troubled Workshop to come to your site. This is the one professional development inservice that produces results, results, results. Call 1.800.545.5736 now. This surprisingly affordable inservice also makes a terrific fund raiser. College credit and 10 professional development clock hours are available. Your staff will finally have the more effective, real-world tools they need to work with today’s challenging, difficult youth.

     

    Contact us now, and begin solving your worst “kid problems” today. Call 1.800.545.5736, or email.

     

    Working with Troubled Students Doesn’t Have to be So Difficult
     


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    Library of Congress ISSN: 1526-9981 | Youth Change, Your Problem-Kid Problem-Solver
    http://www.youthchg.com | 1.503.982.4220 | 275 N. 3rd St; Woodburn, OR 97071
    © Copyright 2019, All Rights Reserved | Permission granted to forward magazine to others.


How to Help Bullied, Potentially Suicidal Students

 

classroom management blog

 

How to Help Bullied,
Potentially Suicidal Students

 


workshop trainer Ruth Herman WellsIt's been the top story in the news: bullied students committing suicide
because they can't cope with the bullying.

I'm educational workshop instructor Ruth Herman Wells, M.S. with ideas that can help right away.

Even veteran counselors and social workers worry they might not always notice every student who is so distressed that they might engage in serious self-harm, but the reality is that the front line of "first responders" is actually made up of educators, who may not have even have mental health expertise.

Further, many educators may have dozens and dozens of students they see each day. That glimpse into a young person's world may not be enough for a teacher to become aware that a student is in serious emotional distress. Especially as schools increase teacher-student ratios, effectively tracking emotionally fragile students becomes harder and harder for even the most dedicated, aware educator.

Despite the significant obstacles educators face when working with deeply troubled youngsters, none of us ever want to wonder if we did absolutely everything we could to spot and stop bullying, and the staggering consequences that can follow. It is a tough, new job to effectively help bullied students.

This issue of our magazine is designed to help you be as pro-active as possible to prevent a tragedy at your site, but by no means is  this short tutorial comprehensive, so if you suspect safety issues, tell your administrator immediately. In the meantime, you can strive to better equip yourself, your students, and your school to be a place where bullying and ensuing tragedies are less likely to happen. This article is a first step in that effort to help bullied students.

For more help, come to our Seattle or Portland Breakthrough Strategies to Teach and Counsel Troubled Youth Workshop (click).

Bad budget? We've got work-study slots if you need financial aid. Call 800.545.5736 for details.

You can also take the distance learning workshop (click), or schedule us to provide a professional development inservice at your site. We also have free online articles, tutorials, strategies and more throughout our site.
 

New Methods to Help Bullied Students Now
 

EDUCATE VICTIMS
AND POTENTIAL VICTIMS


poster for suicidal studentsA good place to start is by educating vulnerable students on how and when to ask for help from adults.

It may seem obvious to you that a child would seek aid, but to the child the bullying can just seem so overwhelming,
massive, and permanent, that the child can feel there is no useful help out there. The printable poster (Poster 248) makes a good visual that can be an on-going reminder.

The resource can also be used as a worksheet to start off a
discussion of issues like these: "Will adults know how to help? " and "What should you do if you feel so hopeless that you want to hurt yourself?"

Gear the discussion to fit the age of your students, but have the discussion right away. Suicides often seem to engender more suicides, and that is why you need to tackle this safety issue right away.

 

STOP USING INEFFECTIVE APPROACHES TO
CONTROL BULLIES


anti-bullying poster 90If only popularity was the best gauge of a method's
effectiveness. The truth is that many very popular methods that are commonly used to rein in bullies are incredibly ineffective and outdated.

Many bullies are not capable of developing a "normal" conscience and compassion, yet many bullying intervention methods– like character ed– rely on students having those traits, or being able to learn them. If you truly want to become more effective at controlling bullies, you must switch to more up-to-date
interventions that don't require a conscience or compassion in order to have impact.

Here's a few examples of strategies that don't rely on the bully being able to have or rapidly develop compassion. Ask the bully to make a list of all the activities that he wants to do in life, then have the youngster go through the list and cross out all the items that "go well" with bullying. For example, the student may list his desire to be a truck driver. Ask the student to consider if the trucking company boss or the truck dispatcher is going to want to want to take time to deal with a driver who bullies dispatchers, co-workers, customers, or superiors. If the student resists, have the student actually talk to a truck company boss or dispatcher, and ask. If the student says "But I won't bully on the job," challenge the student to prove it by stopping bullying now for
one month. If the student can't or won't stop, ask the student who else will help him learn how to be different by the time he's on the job.

Use the expression "Bully Today. Bully Tomorrow." Notice how all these techniques show the bully that by hurting others, she is hurting herself. It is critical that all the interventions you use with bullies contain that element. Bullies may never care about others, but they almost always care about "Me-Me-Me." Use that to reduce the bullying behavior by convincing the bully "I can't hurt others without hurting me." Our Poster #090 (shown above) is another good example of how the bully will only alter her behavior when she sees it's in her own interest to do so. To order this bully prevention poster for $8, click here.
 

WORK WITH BOTH BULLIES
AND BULLIED STUDENTS

Most schools tend to focus on the bully. While a focus on the bully is certainly essential, since it takes two for the situation to occur, it is as important to work with the victim as it is to work with the bully. If you fail to assist the victim to develop the skills, motivation, and attitude needed to avoid further victimization, you are failing to use half the tools you have available.

To leave all the accountability with the bully– who has a demonstrated record of not being trustworthy or compassionate– is unwise, potentially dangerous, and
inappropriate.

It is always critical that you upgrade the victim's skills to prevent and manage victimization. To not do so could be considered negligent. To upgrade the bullied student's skills, focus on spotting aggression before it starts, what to say or do to avoid victimization, where to go, where to never go, and so on. But the recent student suicides are a reminder that adults have to help victims cope. Learning to cope  emotionally may be as important– perhaps more important– than just learning bullying prevention and survival skills.

Create a worksheet entitled "The Consequences of My Actions." This intervention can be used effectively with both bullies and bullied students. Design the worksheet to have three columns. In Column 1, students list their Behaviors such as bullying or being bullied.

In Column 2 and 3, they list the Money Cost and the Pain Cost of those behaviors.

For bullies, the worksheet captures the consequences of bullying, and how those consequences can be so distasteful that it can make bullying less appealing. For bullied students, this worksheet can show what positive outcome can happen when these youngsters learn and use new skills to actively avoid bullying. This worksheet also shows bullied students how failing to take protective steps can predictably yield poor results.

The hallmark of depression is powerlessness. This worksheet can help bullied students feel that their actions can have impact and power. For bullied students, this worksheet can help convince them to learn and use new skills, while also helping to combat the feelings of powerlessness that lead to depression and potentially, to desperate behaviors.

If you prefer to order this worksheet, purchase our Coping Skills Sampler book here.

 

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    Bring the Breakthrough Strategies Workshop to Your Site

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    teachermissYou have students who struggle. We have solutions for students who struggle…so your job doesn’t have to be so difficult. We have cutting-edge strategies to manage group and classroom management problems like behavior disorders, trauma, disrespect, bullying, emotional issues, withdrawal, substance abuse, tardiness, cyberbullying, delinquency, work refusal, defiance, depression, Asperger’s, ADHD and more.

     

    Schedule the Breakthrough Strategies to Teach and Counsel Troubled Workshop to come to your site. This is the one professional development inservice that produces results, results, results. Call 1.800.545.5736 now. This surprisingly affordable inservice also makes a terrific fund raiser. College credit and 10 professional development clock hours are available. Your staff will finally have the more effective, real-world tools they need to work with today’s challenging, difficult youth.

     

    Contact us now, and begin solving your worst “kid problems” today. Call 1.800.545.5736, or email.

     

    Working with Troubled Students Doesn’t Have to be So Difficult
     


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    Library of Congress ISSN: 1526-9981 | Youth Change, Your Problem-Kid Problem-Solver
    http://www.youthchg.com | 1.503.982.4220 | 275 N. 3rd St; Woodburn, OR 97071
    © Copyright 2019, All Rights Reserved | Permission granted to forward magazine to others.


Why Do Some Students Become Violent? The Answer Can Prevent a Tragedy

 

teacher classroom management blog

 

Why Do Some Students Become Violent?

The Answer Can Prevent a Tragedy

 
 

 

 

"We were on a collision course with disaster."


That phrase has started showing up a lot on our workshop evaluations lately.

That phrase is also being used a lot by participants during workshop sessions.

The recent school shooting seems to have crystallized many school staff's concern that their site could face a tragedy. Educators seem intensely worried about best managing and preventing student violence.

Educators are offered so little basic mental health training to help them understand deeply troubled students. When a school shooter does not fit the profile of a consistently aggressive, acting-out student, it can seem confusing.

In the recent incident, the shooter did not fit that classic profile of someone who was routinely assaultive, bullying, or verbally abusive. It can seem very scary when student violence can have an aspect of mystery.

Nor was this violent student someone who was being constantly bullied or tormented, another stereotype of shooters often offered in the media.

Human beings are more complex than either of these two options.

Educators are often more accustomed to preventing and addressing violence from acting-out youth, and may feel far less prepared to prevent or address violence from other types of youth. We have gotten quite a few calls and emails asking for help.

Here are some of the questions we have been receiving at our office and at our workshops around the country.

We're providing this information to you now in the hopes that it will help non-mental health workers compensate a bit for any deficiencies in their mental health training.

However, this article isn't the full training you need on this topic. You're urged to fully update your skills for violent students by learning much more than the headlines provided below.

We also encourage you to pass on this issue to colleagues. If you want to attend one of our workshops so you get a complete understanding of potentially violent students, note that we always offer half-price work-study slots at each workshop so nearly anyone can afford to come.

As possible, we also provide our books on violence at greatly reduced prices to school and agency staff who have little budget but still need resources.

If you do need assistance locating or getting resources, contact us. We're here to help.

 


Plan Your Staff's On-Site
Professional Development Workshop

While Open Dates Still Remain

Learn 100s of Strategies for Work Refusers, Violent,
Tardy, Angry, Disrespectful and Bullied Students

1.800.545.5736 or email

Working with difficult students
doesn't have to be so difficult

 

Answers to Your Questions About

Violent Students

 

Question: Why are some depressed, withdrawn kids becoming suddenly violent?

Answer: Perhaps some of these kids are like pressure cookers that build up so much steam that they literally explode.

Many professionals are used to seeing serious youth depression that includes withdrawal, lethargy, reduced verbiage, reduced activity levels, self-harm and/or threats of self-harm, and comments reflecting hopelessness and despair.

But, some depressed youngsters may explode out of that "acting-in" into serious acting-out. Note that the depressed youngster can explode due to bullying, but it is critical that you realize that he can explode over anything at all, not just bullying. We recommend that you watch for depressed students not just bullied students.

Bullying does not have to occur to prompt a tragedy.


 

Question: Our staff has training on preventing and managing violence by acting-out students like conduct disorders. Will those methods work with other types of students like depressed kids?

Answer: No, you must use completely different methods with different types of students, or else you will be completely ineffective. You can't extrapolate your training on conduct disordered youth and have it work with depressed students.


 

Question: I now understand that the acting-out youngster and depressed youngster have the potential for extreme misconduct. Anyone else I need to know about potentially violent students?

Answer: Absolutely. There is another mental health disorder called "thought disorder." This disorder means that the student's thoughts are disordered. These youngsters may hear voices or have visions that compel them to do bad behavior. Like the other disorders, only a mental health professional can diagnose the problem but anyone can be alert for the disorder and adjusting how they view and work with a youngster who may have the problem. An extreme example of this disorder is John Hinckley. Many clinicians around the country are reporting a big increase in young thought disorders, especially in elementary students.


 

Question: How does my school or agency know if we are on a collision course with disaster?

Answer: Here is a quick test. Your staff must be able to:


(1) Identify at least three types of students who may be at highest risk of extreme violence. (The three types are named in the preceding questions.)

(2) Specify exactly how they must work differently with each type of student as one-size-fits-all methods will fail with all three of these youngsters. If your staff can't answer these two questions, you may have legitimate concern that your site is "on a collision course with disaster." There's no substitute for acquiring a more sophisticated understanding of the different students at risk of extreme violence, and learning which tools to use with each kind.
 


 

Question: Some states are considering laws to penalize bullies. Will that reduce extreme violence like shootings?

Answer: Probably not. Depressed students don't necessarily blow up over a single problem like being harassed. Bullying laws will also likely have little or no impact on whether conduct disorders and thought disorders engage in extreme violence. We all need to understand that violent students aren't all uniform, identical entitites.


 

Question: I am totally confused about thought disorders. What helps?

Answer: The proper medicine taken correctly won't be magic, but the closest thing to it. It's by far the most important tool to help thought disorders. There is no second best option.

Conduct Disorders bookQuestion: Where can I go for more details on the three disorders described here?

Answer: Go to the menu at the top of the page, and click on Blogs. It will show you all our articles including our Introductory issues. Read Introductory Issues 2 and 3 to get more basic information.

There is comprehensive information in our books.

 

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    Reprint or Repost This Article
     

    Bring the Breakthrough Strategies Workshop to Your Site

    Help Unmotivated, Failing, Troubled and Unmanageable Students

    teachermissYou have students who struggle. We have solutions for students who struggle…so your job doesn’t have to be so difficult. We have cutting-edge strategies to manage group and classroom management problems like behavior disorders, trauma, disrespect, bullying, emotional issues, withdrawal, substance abuse, tardiness, cyberbullying, delinquency, work refusal, defiance, depression, Asperger’s, ADHD and more.

     

    Schedule the Breakthrough Strategies to Teach and Counsel Troubled Workshop to come to your site. This is the one professional development inservice that produces results, results, results. Call 1.800.545.5736 now. This surprisingly affordable inservice also makes a terrific fund raiser. College credit and 10 professional development clock hours are available. Your staff will finally have the more effective, real-world tools they need to work with today’s challenging, difficult youth.

     

    Contact us now, and begin solving your worst “kid problems” today. Call 1.800.545.5736, or email.

     

    Working with Troubled Students Doesn’t Have to be So Difficult
     


    Behavior & Classroom Management Problem-Solver Blog Articles

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    Library of Congress ISSN: 1526-9981 | Youth Change, Your Problem-Kid Problem-Solver
    http://www.youthchg.com | 1.503.982.4220 | 275 N. 3rd St; Woodburn, OR 97071
    © Copyright 2019, All Rights Reserved | Permission granted to forward magazine to others.


What Every Youth Professional Must Know About Violent Students

 

classroom management blog


What Every Youth Professional
Must Know About Violent Students

Part 1 of 2

 

 

violent studentPart 1 of 2

workshop presenter Ruth Herman WellsThis is author, keynote speaker and workshop trainer Ruth Herman Wells, M.S. This article is one of the most important I've ever written. That is why we are making it one of our introductory articles for Youth Change Workshops' Behavior and Classroom Management Problem-Solver Blog.

This is Part 1 of 2 sections. Feel free to share this critical, must-know safety information about violent students, with your colleagues and administrators.

There are three types of kids who may be at the highest risk of extreme violence. Obviously, you must take seriously any threat or indication of danger from any kid, so if a dangerous child you know doesn't fit one of these categories, please don't just breathe a sigh of relief. Rather, the point of emphasizing these three top-risk youth, is to have you apportion your time wisely. You can't monitor each child equally. This information may guide you on who you monitor most closely, especially in the absence of other events or information to guide you.

In this space, we will have time to cover only one of these violent students in any kind of detail. We will cover the second two types of students in the third issue of this magazine, plus we'll expand a bit on the information covered here. Our information on the 3 most violent students was first published by The Child Welfare Report in 1998, and is updated and revised here.

The youth at highest risk of extreme violence may be the conduct disordered child. If you don't already know this term, visualize the fictional character, J.R. from the TV show "Dallas" because the hallmark of being a conduct disorder (CD), is having no heart, no conscience, no remorse.

Only a mental health professional can diagnose a conduct disorder for sure, but being aware that you may have a conduct disordered child in your class or group, is important to ensuring your safety, along with the safety of your students, because you work with conduct disorders completely differently than other kids. Since the child with CD has no conscience or relationship capacity, you should not use relationship-based approaches with a diagnosed conduct disorder.

It would be insensitive to call a conduct disorder a "baby sociopath," but that is close to what the term means. It means that the child acts in ways that appear to be seriously anti-social, and the concern is that the child may grow up to be a sociopathic type of person.

Since this child cares only about himself (CDs are predominately male), there are little brakes slowing this child from doing serious or extreme violence. Not every conduct disordered child will engage in horrific behavior. There is a range of misbehavior student with CD may get involved with, ranging from lying to setting fires or being a sexual predator. At the most serious end of the spectrum, lies the possibility of extreme violence, such as a school shooting. Sadly, youth with CD are often your violent students.

Conduct disorder book violent student workshopIn our workshop, we spend at least several hours helping you understand how to work with students with conduct disorder. You can come to one of our workshops, get the workshop online  or get some of our books or ebooks  that teach you how to work with this most hard-to-manage, violent student. But do something to make sure you thoroughly understand how to work completely differently with this violent student than any other child. Your safety– and that of your students– depends on how well you understand and manage these potentially violent youngsters.
 

Methods for Conduct Disordered Youth

There's not space for all the critical do's and don't's that you must know but here are some of the most important to give you a bit of an introduction to what you need to know:

DO

The main point we give in our classes is that these children operate on a cost-benefit system, and that to control your students with CD, you must keep the costs high, and benefits low. These children also especially need to pro-actively learn how to manage their fists, mouth, and actions. Your goal is to teach them that when they hurt others, it often hurts them too. All interventions must be in the context of "I-Me," because that is all this youngster is capable of caring about.

DON'T

There are so many "DON'Ts" that it's hard to know where to start. Even more problematic, many of the ordinary techniques that you use with other kids utterly fail with CDs, and are actually quite dangerous to use. Here are several of the most critical concerns to be aware of when you work with a diagnosed– that's the important word here– conduct disorder. Without the diagnosis, use these guides especially carefully. It's important to note that a little bit of information can be a dangerous thing, so be sure to upgrade your skills on CDs more thoroughly than reading this brief introduction. You can easily use our resources for this purpose. Since safety is always a serious concern when working with CDs, there is no substitute for learning more than the headlines listed here.

DON'T have a heart-to-heart relationship.

DON'T work on building trust.

DON'T rely on compassion, caring, empathy, values, morals.

DON'T expect compassionate behavior.

DON'T trust.

DON'T give second chances.

DON'T believe they care or feel remorse.

Hopefully this brief guide to the hardest-to-manage, most potentially dangerous youth will help you avoid using everyday interventions that will be unproductive, even dangerous. Hopefully this information will steer you towards relying on non-relationship-based interventions that emphasize learning skills like anger control, managing the fist, etc. along with firm rules, boundaries and limits.

 

For More Information on Violent Students:

Be sure to visit the web site for more information you can access right now. If you do come to our Breakthrough Strategies to Teach and Counsel Troubled Youth Workshop, we'll spend as much time on this complicated child as you want. Or, you can arrange an on-site workshop presentation on violent students held at your site for your staff.

webtitlesNeed an online alternative? Our Control the Uncontrollable Students Online Class has what you need, plus 1 free clock hour.

Conduct disorder book If you prefer to read, check out our All the Best Answers for the Worst Kid Problems: Conduct Disorders and Anti-Social Youth book or ebook.
 

 

Next Behavior and Classroom Management Blog Issue:

2 More Types of Students at Highest Risk of Extreme Violence (Part 2)

 

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